Growing Up Decent

Chapter One of this reading compares "decent" and "street" families. While both types of families may occupy the same neighborhood, they are described as having contrasting values and each type of family considers itself distinct from the other. It is important to note, as the author does, that, "most residents are decent or are trying to be" (36). One distinction between the description of decent and street families has to do with their outlook. Street-oriented individuals are more cynical, less trusting. Decent families have some sense of “hope for the future.” They may have more of a sense of agency, a sense that they play an active role in deciding their future. Street-oriented individuals may find themselves spiraling into a self-fulfilling prophecy. 

While reading, I was stuck with two questions. First, how do children of street-oriented families extract themselves from the cycle? Second, how do decent parents manage to keep their kids decent, while still ensuring they are safe on the streets? For the first question, I have little optimism. With such limited support, it seems very difficult for children of street families to learn to live like a decent family. Perhaps with positive role models such as extended family members or fictive kin members, teachers, etc., children can learn how to seek out the right supports. For the second question, it seems as though decent parents are caught between steering their children away from violence, while still making sure they know “the code” of the street and are prepared to protect themselves if necessary. This makes me wonder how decent children see themselves relative to street children. Is there a distinct hierarchical relationship? Yvette’s story (p. 53) suggests that there is, and this seemed to lead to issues for her involving jealousy. There seems to be a very fine line for decent children between being street and being too decent that you don’t belong.